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*This blog does not take responsibility if following the advice here sabotages or even destroys your relationships. Your mileage may vary.
Hypothetically, how many dildos do you think a bot could fit in their valve? Say they're about- uh- Smokescreen's size. Not that that's me or anything. I'm just around his size.
You know you could just ask me straight up about this stuff, right? Cause I personally may not see you as a dude on the frag table but you’ve got needs too so..
It all depends on how flexible your valve is. If you barely do anything with it, you’ll be lucky if you just get one. If you’re an old pro, you could probably get at least one more in there, and some fingers. You could cheat and get a bunch of small dildos to simulate the width of a really big one, too.
Basically, if you can stick your arm up in there, it’s probably a safe bet you can double dip. Don’t push it too hard, or you’ll rip something.
If you were my size class, you could probably end up with a valve full of the average sized things and still have room to spare, but that’s just a scale issue, I think.
Would optic filters /really/ get eaten up by nanites- and start eating up optics- if you left them in for, say, twelve million years?
… well, if your self-repair systems started viewing them as a legit threat to your optics, like a solid wall of foreign contaminant - they might start eating them, yeah.
And maybe they’re a little more vigorous than they need to be due to other stuff they have to worry about.. like war injuries, regular injuries.. diseases and plagues.. general disrepair…
i think i need to find out if mine are doing that too
Me Swoop love Her Bird. Laserbeak.
Well, you know what they say - birds of a feather flock together.
Except you don’t have feathers.
But whatever. Good for you. The ‘beak back home probably would have attempted to slaughter you long before it got to that point, but I guess a ceasefire helps, right?
She like you? Or is this a one-sided thing? .. do you need a Disney song to send her?
I'd rather not leave my partner. If I must go then I will, but it's... I don't want to go that route unless I have to. And I don't have to go until I know he doesn't want me around. Unfortunately, I don't know what he wants right now. Our break to gather our thoughts is turning more into a "don't talk to me at all" because I don't know what to say to him and I don't think he knows what to say to me. And I think one of us should say something but we don't know what and this is getting worse.
Ask him what he wants, straight up.
Lay it down clear cut, no room for second-guessing. No way to wriggle out of it.
… and let the chips fall where they may.
A bird may love a fish, Signore, but where would they live?
… who are you callin’ a fish?
wait there isn't /really/ romance happening between me and megs right? whatever it is it's not romance right
You said you had a thing for him. He’s affectionately teasing you. All we need now is a fun little montage and you’ll find yourself in a Disney wedding.
Favorite pairing: Ratchet/Astrotrain do not question this.
i may require an essay on why this is a thing
NOOOO I DON'T WANT MY DESTINY TO BE FRAGGING FRAGGING MEGATRON
Who said anything about destiny?
Like, you can have a Megafetish and be destined for other stuff. That’s only one destiny. Or something.
NOO NO I DON'T WANT A MEGAFETISH HELP
You don’t choose the fetish.
The fetish chooses you.
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